October 14, 2003

Eenie Meeny Miny Moe

Catch a Tiger By His Toe

two amazing tiger tales hit the news recently...

first, straight outta harlem came news of a man who was keeping a 400-pound Bengal tiger as a pet in a housing project.

authorities were tipped off to the existence of this overgrown urban feline when the cat's owner was hospitalized with suspicious bites on his arm and leg. the would-be tiger trainer claimed that the bites came from a pit bull, but doctors quickly ruled out the possibility of a canine perpetrator. no, those bites came from something larger than a dog, they postulated.

when the police descended on the man's fifth-floor harlem apartment they indeed found more than snoopy. the cops drilled a hole through the door, inserted a portable camera and saw a tiger "pacing the floor like he was in an Exxon commercial."

nyc's finest finally subdued the urban kitty by shooting it with a tranquilizer, but not before it belched out a series of loud roars that could be heard for two city blocks. word has it, the puddy is now chilling the most at a sanctuary in ohio.


then, equally as bizarre and unsettling came the news from sin city that illusionist roy horn of siegfried & roy fame had been attacked by a tiger while on-stage in the middle of a show at the mirage.

apparently, roy told the tiger, a 7-year-old male named montecore, to lie down. when the feline refused, roy tapped the cat on the nose with a microphone to get its attention. the animal took exception and grabbed at horn's arm, causing the entertainer to stumble.

the tiger, which weighs about 600 pounds, then lunged at roy and dragged him off the stage by the neck. the latest word is that roy is in critical but stable condition. reportedly, the first couple of days after the attack were touch and go, but now it seems that roy will pull through.

clearly nothing funny about this incident...except perhaps for this quintessentially tasteless re-enactment that is circulating the web...

Bad Kitty

Posted by bojon at October 14, 2003 10:27 PM